Tag Archives: Gamer

The day Megan rejected me.

Monday, I told how I’d swore off dating and met Megan on my birthday; how my friend accused me of “trying too hard” and Megan herself forgot my name. Yesterday, I told how we discovered Megan was a gamer, and I called “dibs.”

Our story didn’t end there.

In fact, the story of our relationship properly begins with utter rejection and total humiliation.

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Dear Apple

no thanksDear Apple,

I love my ipod.

I hope someday to have an iphone, but only if you sign a contract with my carrier instead of a carrier with a reputation for dropped calls.

I have nothing against Macs though as a gamer I have opted for many a PC (though this stands for “personal computer” and shouldn’t necessarily refer to architecture. Aren’t Macs personal?)

But please, for the love of Thor, stop offering to install Safari on my computer. I have no need of it. I have no use for it. There is not a thing I would do with it if it were installed (except, perhaps, uninstall it).

Please stop offering to install it just because I install other Apple software.

Sincerely,

One who is less likely to be your customer in the future.

Why in the name of Hyperion’s left elbow would I buy a Mac when…

macpcMac users are always trying to get me to buy a Macintosh product. This alone is bizarre, as though Mac users are proselytizing members of some hardware architecture cult. I certainly don’t approach owners of other brand names trying to convince them that MY television, MY blu-ray player, MY surround-sound system, MY computer (or anything else) is better than theirs, thus they should switch — even if I’m thrilled with my own choice (as I am, for example, with my HDTV and blu-ray player). When someone comes to me for advice, I’m happy to recommend brands I like and caution against others. But by and large what others buy is their own business.

Why Mac users feel differently is beyond my comprehension.

In truth, I would love to own a Mac for no other reason than I could use Garage Band software. Macs, however, (for a lower-middle-class apartment dweller like myself) are cost-prohibitive. Furthermore, I’m a gamer, and Mac gamers have to wait anywhere from 6 months to 2 years for the release of content already available for windows.

I would still be tempted to buy a Mac if not for one thing:

My Ipod doesn’t work like it should.

To see why this doubly concerns me, you need to consider what an Ipod is: Nothing more than a (relatively) small hard drive with a basic operating system/application fit over the top to provide some user interface.

spec-vs-compIn other words, an Ipod is a very small, very simple computer.

It has less parts, no other programs, and doesn’t interact with any peripherals except those which simply duplicate what it’s transmitting. There aren’t multiple drives or power sources or partitians or cables. You don’t need to edit the registry or open a task manager or install additional applications or designate login information.

All things being equal, an Ipod should run easier and smoother than any computer known to man, because it is a simpler device. A single wheel is more likely to function correctly than a whole automobile. A lawnmower is easier to repair than a car. The simpler any object or system, the easier it is to run.

My Ipod is borked six ways from Sunday.

  • Navigating movies often freezes it after the first movie. Only a hard reset will allow me to continue navigating.
  • Sometimes, the Ipod refuses to turn off. It ceases responding to any buttons (including the combination for a hard reset) and the only way to turn it off are to let the batteries drain completely.
  • The Ipod will freeze Itunes during an attempt to sync with a computer.

Furthermore, all of the above problems have been true of at least three different kinds of Ipodmac-vs-pcfats I used, and with each installation of the Ipod and Itunes software each time.

When someone can’t create a working wagon, would you trust them to create a working automobile?

Furthermore, the “Mac vs. PC’ propoganda is hilarious. According to their various commercials and pictures, “PC”s are bloated, disfunctional, and crippled.

Do you know what “PC” stands for?

(P)ERSONAL (C)OMPUTER.

Do you know what a Macintiosh is?

A personal computer.

pcwiremessYou see, what they’re trying to say is that WINDOWS PCs are everything that is wrong with the world. But they can’t, because it isn’t true, and if they did they’d get sued (and rightfully so). So they keep the generic term now used to refer to Windows and Windows-compatible architecture, but the acronym simply means “personal computer”.

I guess Macs either aren’t personal or else they aren’t computers. Either way, I don’t want one until they can make an Ipod that works.